


Your Village Called

by pprfaith



Series: Wishlist 2009 [17]
Category: Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter - Laurell K. Hamilton, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Gen, Getting Together, Romance, crackish, old fic, silliness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-01
Updated: 2015-11-01
Packaged: 2018-04-29 09:09:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5122658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pprfaith/pseuds/pprfaith
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>... they want their idiot back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Your Village Called

**Author's Note:**

> Saturnsailor requested Buffy, the Vampire Slayer/Anita Blake, Dawn/Asher, with no particular prompt. - It turned crackish, I think. Pirates, be warned.
> 
> 2009 repost.

+

Asher is an idiot. He is. A big honking, scarred, sexy, French, ancient, undead _idiot._

Totally.

And she will tell anyone that comes within earshot so. She already told Jason, who came to take her out to the movies. He retreated after he finished laughing his ass off and she slammed the door in his face. It’s his own fault. You don’t laugh at a woman’s abject misery.

Especially not when it’s caused by male, stubborn, oblivious _idiots_. 

Anything with a Y-chromosome had better duck because she’d officially had it with testosterone thickheadedness. Asher is dead though, so does he even produce testosterone anymore? Eugh, not going there. _Not_ going there.

After Jason’s little visit she called Buffy because sister knows best. Or, in this case, sister has the most experience when it comes to brain-dead, chauvinistic vampires with a hankering for drama. Buffy suggested ice-cream and the cold shoulder and they chatted for over an hour about slayers, the council and Dawn’s new job as a liaison with the St. Louis Kiss. 

Dawn felt better right until she hung up the phone and was alone again with nothing but thoughts of that damned, blue-eyed, holier than thou jerk. 

Grrrr! She wishes Spike were here with her and not dead, so he could kick his fellow corpse’s ass from here to Mexico. 

There’s a knock on her door. If Jason’s come back to gloat, she’ll show him just what she learned growing up around several slayers. She stomps through the living room and rips the door open, ready to yell at him only to find…

“Asher.”

“Dawn,” he says in that sexy, smooth voice of his and lets himself in without waiting for an invitation. Maybe she should look up that un-invite spell, just on principle. 

She slams the door shut yet again and spins to face down the brooding vampire in her living room, arms crossed under her chest. “What do you want?” she snarls.

“It has been brought to my… attention that I am being a… big honking, scarred, sexy, French, ancient, undead _idiot._ ,” he quotes rather deadpan and Dawn knows she’s blushing from the roots of her hair right down to her cleavage.

She’s going to kill Jason. Just as soon as she has her circulation back under control. “Well,” she snaps, trying not to sound as embarrassed as she is, “You are.”

He does a sort of half nod that leave his head hanging sadly. “I am afraid I don’t know why.”

“How…a… why… you…,” she stutters. Really sexy. But how can he not know that, “You told me that you thought it was ‘unwise for us to be in a relationship’.”

“It is,” he insists, still not looking at her.

She tightens her arms, more hugging herself now than looking tough and tells him in a small voice, “You could have just said you don’t want me.”

 _That_ gets a reaction out of him. His head jerks up, blue eyes wide and focused intensely on her. She feels the need to squirm and gets the slight impression that maybe they are on way different pages of way different books here. 

“That is not what I meant. I was merely trying to protect you.”

“Hello!” she raises a hand to wave, “Sister of the Queen Slayer here!” She’s not made of porcelain, damn him.

“I know that. I was trying to protect you from me. I’m damaged, Dawn. Look at me.” He brushes his golden hair out of his face, displaying the scars he always hides to well. That’s why he turned her down? _That?_

Does the man have any sense in that ancient noggin of his at all?

“And I’m a mystical lock pick transformed into a human being.” She smacks down his argument.

“That is not-“

“My blood has little bolts of green lightning in it. I zap people when I touch them during that time of the month!”

If vampires could blush, Asher would probably combust right about… now. Ha. She’s got him. She stomps one foot maturely and snaps, “So who’s the Side Show Freak now?”

He scowls fiercely and suddenly, opening his mouth to almost snarl, “You are not a freak and – “

Exactly.

Whatever he’s about to add never leaves his mouth because Dawn’s kissing him silly and doesn’t plan to let go anytime soon. Stupid vampire. If he’d told her all that from the start, she could have saved herself the trouble of being upset all day long. 

Idiot.

+


End file.
